


Stay With Me. (Joshler)

by Leahtails123



Category: Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots, joshler - Fandom, tøp
Genre: Adventures assured, All the cuteness, Angst, Depressed josh, Fluff and Angst, Friends turn Lovers, Gay Josh Dun, Gay Tyler Joseph, M/M, Protective Tyler, Supportive Tyler, Teenage Josh Dun, Teenage Tyler Joseph, anxious josh, cuteness, happy endings, josh dun - Freeform, joshler - Freeform, tyler joseph - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-03-09 13:53:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 18,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18918334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leahtails123/pseuds/Leahtails123
Summary: Tyler and Josh had been friends for years. They were inseparable. But when high school came the pair drifted apart, with Tyler suddenly becoming the popular kid thanks to his skills in basketball. So when Josh invites Tyler to his first live music show, Tyler feels like it’s time to get to know his old best friend again. Adventures are had, story’s are told and the boys reconnect. But is it old friends finding that flow again or is it the sparks of something else?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! I’m so glad to be back and writing again, anyone who read Dance With Me In The Rain knows that by the end of the story I was dealing with some stuff that really messed with my mental health. But I’m coping better now and I’m really really glad to be getting this story up for you all to enjoy! Thank you so much to my friend for helping me edit! I really hope you guys like this one as much as you did with my last! 
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy :)

 

“Hello, my gay prince” Brendon said, dropping his lunch tray onto the table and scaring Josh out of his music induced haze.

“Gay prince? That’s a new one. I don’t like it.” Josh said, wrinkling his nose in disgust as he pulled out the working earbud from his left ear. Brendon winked, grabbing the opposite earphone and pulled it up to listen.

“Bro, you need to buy some new earphones. How can you live with only one ear working?” Brendon sighed, dropping the earbud and replacing it with the cardboard-like pizza from his tray. Josh shrugged. He knew Brendon was right, but decent headphones were expensive. Considering he was saving for a drum kit, even a measly earbud was a luxury he could not afford.

“I can suffer a little longer. I only need $100 more to get my drum kit so the rest can wait. My birthdays soon anyway so my Mom will probably get me some.” Josh replied, his eyes never leaving the broken earbud he held in his hand. Josh signed before dropping the broken bud and placing the working one back in his ear, wiggling it slightly to get the wire to sit right. 

 

“Oi! Tyler!” 

The jarring sounds made Josh jump, stilling his fidgeting completely. The voice was loud and all to familiar. Mark Becker. School bully and dumbass extraordinaire. Whereas other schools have football teams they took immense pride in, Josh’s school had the basketball team. They’d been featured in three different state championships and even had chances of going national. Well one player in particular did. 

 

“Ooo look, Joshie, it’s your childhood best friend. Hey, Tyler, look! I replaced youuu” 

Brendon said, only raising his voice an octave as to not draw any real attention from the boy that was now making his way to the centre cafeteria table. 

 

Tyler Joseph was many things; singer, songwriter, piano player, basketball star, next door neighbour and ex best friend. He was all around the golden boy, with not a single peer or teacher having something against him. Not even Josh hated him, and he actually had a reason too. They’d lived next to each other since they were old enough to remember; and they seemed to have been friends just as long. Any photo found in ether the Dun or Joseph household most likely had the other in it. They’d been inseparable. Until the start of high school. Tyler got into basketball in an attempt to get a scholarship whereas Josh got into music as an attempt to do the same. Both were successful but only one of the two occupations brought with it the flood of popularity. And just like that, Tyler had lots of new friends and Josh was left in the dust, never to be acknowledged by his best friend again.

 

“I really don’t get why you don’t hate that guy, Josh. He left you! It’s totally a good reason to hate him, you know” Brendon said, brandishing his half eaten pizza like a greasy pointer.

 

“Why hate him, Bren? He chose basketball and turned out to be good at it, I chose music and turned out to be good at it and only one of them is the popular option.” Josh replied, taking the lonely earbud out his ear and stuffing it in his pocket to join its friend.

 

“I still think it’s a rotten thing to do” Brendon grumbled, stuffing the remaining pizza into his mouth. Josh snorted, if one thing was for sure, Brendon could keep a grudge for anyone.

 

“Come on sir grudge-alot, we have early band practice.” Josh said, taking his tray as he went to leave.

 

“Sir Grudge-alot? I like it!” Brendon exclaimed before following suit.

 

**************

 

Band practice went quickly, so quickly that the last lessons of the day seemed to jump at Josh like an unsuspected bill. But luckily for Josh, he was an average achieving student so nothing posed a real challenge. 

“Whatcha doing after class, boyo? Anything I should grace my presence with?” Brendon said, appearing next to Josh. 

“Not really Bren, I’ve got to tune everything before tomorrow’s show at Jamie’s Cafe “ 

“Dude, you don’t need any practice. You're awesome” Brendon said, throwing his arm over Josh’s shoulder as they walked out the school grounds. Josh shrugged. 

“ Yeah but if I don’t tune and check before this show I might be known as the guy who messed up a show and not the guy who’s ‘awesome’ “ 

Looking at Brendon made Josh realised that he wasn’t listening, his eyes were trained on some guy in insanely tight skinny jeans who just happened to be leaning against Brendon’s car.

“You and Ryan hooking up again then huh?” Josh asked, amused. 

“Yadda Yadda. I’ll catch you later” Brendon said, again ignoring a word Josh said. 

“I’ll walk home then.” Josh said, kicking the dirt under his feet slightly as he laughed. 

 

***************

Home was close when you were in a car, but on foot it took Josh 20 minutes to get from the school to his street, but he didn’t mind, it gave him chance to listen to his recorded drum beats and figure out what they were missing. His head was bent towards the floor as he turned the corner, his eyes scanning his phone as he mentally judged his work.

Without any real warning and a mighty whack, Josh suddenly found himself on the floor. A string of curse words bubbles inside him as he rubbed his wrist. Luckily it wasn’t sprained or broken. Tomorrow’s show was going to hurt though. 

A slender, pale hand emerged into Josh’s view and suddenly he was all to aware that he’d walked into someone. He took the hand, willing himself to not look up until he was eye level with his unfortunate victim.

“Hey I’m sorry- oh it’s you” Josh said, lifting his head until he was peering into the deep brown eyes of Tyler Joseph. 

“Hi. I’d say watch out but I wasn’t paying attention ether. So I’m sorry too” Tyler said, scratching the back of his neck. Josh hated the fact he knew that meant Tyler was feeling awkward. He’s done it since they were young and Josh wished he could forget Tyler as fast as Tyler forgot him. 

“It’s cool, I’ll look where I’m going and you look where you're going. Should be easy, huh?” Josh joked, his smile only a little forced. Tyler smiled back, a genuine smile, no force needed. Being neighbours, they both had to walk the same way, and Josh only managed a few steps before the awkwardness compelled him to talk. 

“Don’t you have basketball practice today?” Josh asked. 

“We were meant too. Coach sprained his ankle last period trying to restless some kid of the climbing rope so he cancelled it. The game is on Friday so we still have Thursdays practice” Tyler replied, his rapid eye movement another sure sign he was feeling as awkward a Josh. 

“Wow, who’d have thought coach Peters could break anything? He’s built like a horse” Josh said, his response earning him a chuckle from his awkward walking partner. After a lengthy silence, Tyler piped up.

“So, I heard you're doing good as a musician? Got that drum kit then?” He looked generally interested and Josh had to remember that this was a one time conversation. Nothing more. 

“No, not yet, $100 more and it’s mine but for now I’ve been using the one at Jamie’s Cafe. We’ve got a little show on tomorrow actually” Josh replied, shrugging slightly. 

“You got a show? That’s awesome for you!” Tyler said and Josh had to marvel at home genuinely he felt for other people and their achievements. 

“Yeah, you should come check it out. We don’t have a vocalist but I think we’re alright. But I’m kinda bias” Josh said, laughing slightly. 

“I’m sure you're great. What time's the show?” Tyler asked, his eyes finally fixed on Josh and not everywhere else.

“7:30 tomorrow night.” Josh replied, hoping quietly that his memory was serving him right in his flustered state.

“I finish practice at 7:30 so I’ll try to stop by after, yeah?” Tyler said, nodding to himself as if he was replying to his own question. 

Without realising, the pair had made it to their homes. The boys looked up in confused shock as they realised they’d managed to get home without actually paying attention. 

“Yeah, that’ll be good. Uh, see you around Tyler” Josh said, saluting the other boy before running up the steps and into his house.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Hope your enjoying the story so far! I have to warn you though this is going to be be (hopefully) a serious slow burn story so I’m hoping to have a lot of chapters. 
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy :)

Josh let his shoulders sag as he shut the door behind him. He’d been friends with Tyler for years. Every childhood story had him in it yet he couldn’t even have a normal conversation with him anymore. Josh knew it was partly his fault. He knew he’d just given up talking to Tyler once he’d began walking to school alone and ignoring him. But Tyler had a hand in it too. It had all become so complicated. Huffing, Josh went in search of a snack.

 

Padding into the kitchen, Josh played his conversion with Tyler over and over again in his head. Wondering if it had been a good idea inviting him to his show and only letting himself have the tiniest hope that he would show up. When they’d been friends, they’d talked about starting a band. They’d planned it for hours, both of them adding their own little details to make their band unique. They’d even thought of a name: Twenty One Pilots. 

Josh thought back to the night the name was chosen. They were twelve and they’d been having one their frequent sleepovers. He remembered how Tyler had been lying upside down over the side of the bed fiddling with a broken nerf gun...

*flashback* 

“So what are we going to call ourselves?” Josh asked, twisting the pen in his hand as they planned their future band. Tyler hummed, his face turning red as he sat upside down off the bed. Josh laughed, reaching over to attempt to draw on him. Tyler batted him away. 

“Well, when do we want to start the band properly?” Tyler asked, dropping the nurf gun and placing his hands on the ground as he did a handstand off the bed to land next to Josh.

”I was thinking after high school? We’d be old enough to drive so we could tour and stuff. What about you?” Josh said, his brow furrowed as he drew in the margin of their band notes.

”I think my mom and dad want me to go to college like my brothers. So how about 21? We could start then?” Tyler mused. Josh though about it for a moment. 

“That could be the start of our band name! But instead of numbers we’d write it out. So we’d be Twenty  One- something” Josh said, a huge grin plastered on his face. Tyler grinned back. 

“Hey, we both wanted to be pilots when we were little, so it could be Twenty One Pilots!” Tyler exclaimed, the pair high-fiving proudly. 

“Our band will be awesome!” Tyler said, the grin still wide on his face.

”It really will be” Josh agreed.

*flashback ends*

It was their dream. But life never pans out like planned. Despite everything, Josh had kept the name. He didn’t know why, but some part of him hoped keeping the name would bring Tyler back somehow.

Reaching the fridge, Josh quickly shook the memories away. Instead focusing on the contents of the fridge.

 

“Oh hi, honey, I didn’t hear you come in. How was school?” Mrs Dun said as she entered the kitchen. People said that Josh was the male equivalent to his mother, with the same facial structure, mousy brown hair and dark eyes, he’d been told since he was young that he’d break girls hearts. As the fates would have it, girls hearts were safe; guys on the other hand, not so much. Luckily for him his family didn’t mind. Happiness was key for them.

 

“It was okay, the usual really. How was work?” Josh replied, retrieving a yogurt from the fridge before turning to his Mom.

 

“It was alright, thank you. Are you all ready for your show tomorrow?” Mrs Dun asked, opening the draw beside her and passing Josh a spoon as she spoke.

 

“Yeah I should be. Everything sounded good so it’s just gonna be down to performance on the day I think.” Josh said as he ate. 

 

“That’s good. I saw you and Tyler talking. What’s that about?” Mrs Dun said, trying to sound only mildly curious. 

“We literally ran into each other at the top of the street. It was a lot of awkwardness then I invited him to come see me play, he said he’d try to make it after practice” Josh said, signing. 

“Well at least he said he’d try. Keep your chin up Josh, if you two are meant to be friends then he’ll come back. Maybe not today, but someday.” Mrs Dun said, smiling at her oldest son from across the marble island. 

“Oh shoot I need to pick up your sister. I’ll be back to cook dinner at 5 so don’t go ruining your appetite with yogurts!” Mrs Dun shouted as she dashed out the room. Josh laughed under his breath as he thought back to what his Mom had said about Tyler. And for a moment, he believed it.

 

*************************

 

*Tylers PoV*

 

“Hey Ty, Mom said dinner will be ready in 10 minutes so can you set the table?” Madison said from the doorway. Tyler had gone straight to his room when he’d come back, deciding he’d take the spare time to work on this weeks homework.

“Thanks Mads, I’ll be down in a minute” Tyler replied, looking up briefly to look at his youngest sibling and only sister. The Joseph’s all shared the same look, same dark brown eyes and only slightly lighter hair, they all looked a bit like vague copies of each other. Looking at his sister now, Tyler realised she had something else to ask.

“What’s up, Madison?” Tyler asked, putting his pen down and vowing silently to himself that he’ll finish his algebra homework after dinner. Madison looked both ways down the hallway before rushing into Tyler’s room and shutting the door.

“When are you going to come out to our parents, Ty?” Madison asked, her voice a whisper. Tyler shrugged. He didn’t know why he was being cagey about it all, his oldest brother had come out as Bi years ago and his parents had been fine with it so coming out as gay wouldn’t be that hard for them to accept. No, it wasn’t his parents knowing that bothered him. It was who they would tell. 

“Soon. Probably when I finish school” Tyler said, staring at his hands in thought.

“That’s in 6 months! You can’t expect us all to hide it for another 6 months!” Madison exclaimed, quickly clamping her hand over her mouth to quite herself.

“I know I’m sorry! It’s just. Your not in the locker room for basketball. You don’t here some of the crap the guys come out with. Last thing I want is for them to force me off the team for being gay. I need this scholarship Madison.” Tyler said, his voice pleading.

He’d known coming out to his siblings had been the right idea at the time but asking them to hide it from his parents for so long hadn’t been the plan. Madison took his hand, squeezing it gently. 

“We will keep quite. But I’m sure if you explained the situation to Mom and Dad they’d be more than happy to keep it quite till graduation. We all love you Ty.” Madison smiled, squeezing his hand once more before getting to her feet and heading for the door.

 

“Oh yeah, are you going to Josh’s show tomorrow?” Madison asked, turning from the one open door.

“How did you know about his show?” Tyler asked, confused. 

“Bro, you might of ditched Josh for your homophobic ass friends doesn’t mean I stopped being friends with him or his sister. Ashley invited me; so your going right?” 

Tyler looked away; as much as he loved his sister she really could be blunt sometimes.

“It starts when practice finishes so I’m going to head straight there from school” Tyler replied, looking back at his younger sister. 

“Good. Now come on, the table won’t set itself!” Madison said, clapping once before turning to leave the room. Tyler sighed but followed suit. 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I hope you all are liking the story! Now I do have to warn you, this chapter had some Homophobia in therefore there is a slur or two. It’s just a warning to anyone who is uncomfortable with the language (no actual swearing though) 
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy :)

“Tonight’s the night, my gay prince! How do you feel knowing you're about to become locally famous?” Brendon asked, sliding into his usual seat in the band room and shooting Josh a wink.

Josh smiled, as much as Brendon could really be over the top sometimes, Josh really admired his optimism and confidence in himself and his friends. 

“Yes it is. Now it all depends on whether I become locally famous for being good or for messing up” Josh said as he rummaged around his bag for his second drum stick. He’d been up late last night and he was hoping he hadn’t been so sleep deprived to only put in one stick.

“Bro, you're going to nail it. You’ve managed to produce the whole backing track to the point you only need Patrick there to do the live guitar. And you're only doing that so your not alone on stage!” Brendon said, leaning back in his seat and kicking his legs up so they rested on top of the seat in front of him. Josh had to admit, he’d put way too much work into this performance for anything really to go wrong. All he had to do was keep his nerves in check and he was golden. 

After retrieving his second stick, Josh decided to change the subject before he began to overthink things.

“So, I urmm....Literally ran into Tyler yesterday.” Josh said, scratching the back of his head casually in an attempt to cover up his awkwardness.  

Brendon sat bolt upright in his chair.

“Really? What did golden boy have to say? Did he complain you nearly gave him basketball elbow or something?” He sounded angry, but he always did when it came to Tyler or anyone who’d wronged his friends. 

“No, he apologised actually. Didn’t say much after that though. He made it all pretty awkward. But I kinda invited him to the show tonight, so that’s something I guess”Josh replied, swirling the sticks in his hand as he went to sit behind the drum set. 

“Basketball practice doesn’t finish till 7:30 Josh, he won’t show up” Brendon stated, crossing his arms.

“He said he’d try to stop by after.” Josh said; looking from the drum kit to his friend, who shot him a harrowing glare of disapproval.

“Don’t give me that look, Bren. Don’t worry, I haven’t gotten my hopes up. I know he probably won’t show.” Josh sighed, wishing he’d not brought Tyler up to the one person who actively didn’t like him. 

“Look, Josh, I know you still want to be friends with him, and I know you're still holding out hope he’ll come back and be your friend again.” Brendon sighed, unfolding his arms and leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

“I’m not going to squish that hope for you. That’s not what I’m trying to do. But just remember you did all this on your own. The band you two thought up when you were kids exists because of you.” Brendon said, deciding to get up from his spot and moving to the chair closest to the drums. 

“You have overcome your crippling anxiety and depression after the accident for this moment. And I know you think you’ll never fully overcome your demons. But its okay if you don’t! You’re coping so much better because your trying.” Brendon carried on, his eyes full of pride. 

“What are you getting at Bren? Apart from trying to make me blush” Josh said with a frown.

“All I’m saying is don’t let something like Tyler not showing up ruin any of the confidence you’ve gained. He’s not been here to help you through the panic attacks, or the set backs, so don’t let his presence- or absence, change anything. Okay?” Finally finishing his speech, Brendon seemed to deflate into his seat. Josh didn’t give a verbal reply instead opted to nod at his friend before turning his full attention to the drum kit before him, steadying his hands before playing, and trying to let his mind wander away from worrying as to whether he'd show.

 

*Tylers PoV* 

 

“That’s a good practice over and done with lads. If you play like that tomorrow night we’re sure to be keeping that trophy!” Coach shouted from the end of the gymnasium. From where Tyler stood he could just seem the white of the bandage that encased his sprained ankle. He took one last shot from half court, sinking the ball into the basket with ease.

“Hit the showers, lads, I’ll see you all tomorrow.” Coach shouted again, this time earning a chorus of whoops and shouts from his team mates. 

 

Once in the locker room, Tyler rusher his shower, eager to keep his promise to Josh. 

“Hey, Joseph, what’s the rush?” Came a voice, it was Mark. 

Mark was tall, the perfect height for basketball. With blonde hair and blue eyes he was the perfect lady magnet. And unfortunately he knew it. 

“I’m going down to see that live show at Jamie’s cafe, it’s starts about now” Tyler replied; rubbing his damp hair with his towel before stuffing it in his gym bag. 

“Isn’t that being performed by your faggot neighbour?” Mark replied, grinning to himself. Tyler composed himself. Sentences like that made him want scream. They were also the reason why he wouldn’t come out till graduation. He needed this team more than he needed to be out. 

“Don’t call him that, man, what are you, twelve? But yeah, it’s Josh playing. Composed it all himself apparently” Tyler said, trying his best to just sound causal and not let on how much the comment annoyed him. 

“Careful Joseph, your gonna start sounding like some Homo lover or something” Pete; Marks brother; said, laughing as his pumped fists with Mark. 

“Wherever man, see you guys tomorrow.” Tyler said; throwing on his bag and hoodie over his shoulder and bolting for the door. 

 

******************

By the time Tyler got to Jamie’s Cafe, it was 8:15, he’d tried his best to rush but all the busses were running late adding an extra ten minutes to his arrival time. In his haste to get there, Tyler had forgotten to put on his hoodie; his wet hair and sleeveless gym vest did little to keep the evening chill at bay. Praying he hadn’t missed the whole show, Tyler raced through the door. 

Immediately upon entry, the music hit him like a brick wall, the layers of the beat washing over Tyler like emotions. The vibe in the room was electric. Everyone was quiet as they watched; some even dancing in the to small room. The drums reverberated through your bones and made you want to dance so Tyler didn’t blame them. Letting out a breath, Tyler slowly squeezed his way to the front, trying not to ruin anyone’s night by barging past them in his haste to get to the front. Reaching the very edge of the front row, Tyler stopped dead at the sight of Josh on stage, mouth unabashedly agape. He was pushing every last ounce of passion into each bang of the drum. His face full of pure determination as he played. His muscles moving rhythmically with the beat. Tyler was awe struck. Closing his eyes, he let the vibe flow through him like a chemical in his blood. Without really thinking, Tyler began to make up the lyrics that would go with this beat. How he’d bend the words and lines to fit the pace.All too soon, the song ended and Tyler was left wanting more. 

He couldn’t wait to tell Josh how good he was, how his music had made him feel from the second he’d walked in. But then he remembered. He and Josh weren’t friends anymore. And it was his fault. Without warning his bright mood was gone and all trances of the music had left his mind. Tyler was suddenly aware of how annoyed he was with is own existence. He turned to leave, not wanting to ruin anyone’s good mood with his sudden self hatred only to be stopped by a warm hand on his arm. 

“Hey, you made it” 

It was Josh. Tyler turned to the drummer, rubbing the back of his neck, trying to compose himself.

“Very late but yeah, I made it. Sorry I only got to see the end of your show” Tyler said, his gaze fixed on the hem of his shirt. Josh put a hand on Tyler’s bare shoulder. He was still cold from being outside so the heat was comforting on his cold skin. Tyler was close enough to Josh that he could feel the heat radiating off the rest of his body. 

“Hey, you're here and that's what counts. So, what did you think? Did I do the Twenty One Pilots name proud?” Tyler stilled completely, his eyes wide. 

“You kept the name?” Tyler said quietly. Josh seemed to turn shy, rubbing his elbow awkwardly. 

“Yeah... I thought I might as well, you know? You don’t mind, do you?” Josh said, suddenly worried. Tyler couldn’t shake his head fast enough. 

“No no! It’s awesome that you kept it. And you did it more than proud, you shot it right out of the water!” Tyler said, grinning. Josh smiled, his cheeks becoming slightly pink. 

“Thanks, Tyler. So, why were you trying to leave without saying goodbye?” Josh asked, dropping his hand from where it rested on Tyler’s shoulder. The heats sudden absence jarring. Josh’s brown eyes were full of curiosity and only a little hurt. It made Tyler shuffle where he stood. 

“I... I came in and you were playing so well. Before I could even see you I could feel the emotion in the music with every hit of the drum. Watching you only confirmed how much dedication and passion you’ve put into it and I wanted to jump hug you and tell you your nailed it but then I remembered.” Tyler said, his words coming out in a rush. Josh frowned.

“Remembered what Tyler?” Josh asked, confused. 

“I remembered I abandoned you. I remembered how we’d been so close and then I just left for a bunch of new friends I hate. I ruined our friendship for popularity” Tyler said, his eyes beginning to feel damp. 

Josh looked stunned, the sudden confession obviously not being what he’d expected. After a moment to process, Josh spoke. 

“Listen Tyler. What happened sucked, it really did. And I’m not going to say I’ve forgiven you. But if you want to be friends again. We can be. One day at a time, yeah?” He held out his hand and Tyler took it in a firm handshake. The pair grinned at each other. Tyler vowed to himself as he held his old friends hand that he was going to fix things. He’d get everything back to how it was before high school and then, just maybe, things would turn out alright. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! How are you liking the story so far? Another warning, we’ve got a mention of a car accident and a death in this one, so trigger warning for those my lovelies.  
> I really hope your enjoying this story, cause I’m really enjoying writing it :D
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy! :)

*Tylers PoV*

After the performance, Tyler offered to stay behind and help Josh tidy up, deciding now was as good a time as any to start reconnecting with his friend. Tyler had just put the lid on the last drum box and was about to pick it up when the slim form of Brendon Urie perched himself on top of it. Tyler knew the only people left in the building were himself, Josh and Jamie, the cafes owners. So having Brendon appear out of nowhere was startling. 

“Uh. Hey Brendon I need to move this” said Tyler, frowning as he gestured towards the box Brendon now sat on. Brendon didn’t budge. 

“Tyler. I’m giving you a heads up” Brendon said, his voice dripping with barely contained threat. 

“You really messed with Josh when you left. I mean really messed with him. He’s not the same kid from middle school” Brendon said as he inspected his hands. Tyler stared, unsure what Brendon was getting at. 

“After the accident Josh was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. He has Panic attacks, bad thoughts. Everything. So I’m doing this for his own good. If your going to up and leave again. Do it now before he gets attached.” Brendon said, looking Tyler dead in the eye. 

Tyler thought back to Josh’s accident in middle school. Josh and his dad had been on their way back from some father and son quality time when a drunk driver had crashed into them after running a red light. Only Josh had left the car alive. The loss had shook both family’s hard. Tyler had tried his best to be there for Josh in the last year of middle school, but to Tyler, Josh had seemed fine and he’d assumed the therapy he was getting had been working.  Looking back, maybe Josh had just been a good liar. 

 

“I’m not going anywhere. I want to fix things with him Brendon” Tyler said, swallowing hard as he tried his best to put as much meaning into his voice as possible. Brendon looked at him for a moment. Sighing before moving forward to lean on his knees. 

“I believe you. But seriously Tyler. He’s fragile. So if you’re coming back, you better be here for everything, the fun days out and the days he can’t even get out of bed. Cause if you hurt him, I swear you’ll never get this close to him ever again” Brendon said, every word screaming finality. Tyler merely nodded. Brendon stood, straightening out the imaginary creases in his jacket before extending his hand. 

“Josh is soft, so you’re going to have to work to impress me before I start acting like your friend. But I’ll give you a fair chance” Brendon said at Tyler took his outstretched hand. 

“Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind” Tyler replied, shaking the other boys hand firmly. Brendon nodded before releasing his grasp and heading for the fire door. Tyler hadn’t noticed before; but the door was open.

_That’s how he got in._

Tyler thought. He watched as Brendon slipped out the building, the only evidence of his presence being the feeling he’d left in Tyler’s chest. Shaking his head, Tyler turned to final drum box and got back to finishing packing.

 

*****************

 

*Josh’s PoV* 

 

“Thanks for staying behind Tyler. You didn’t have to” Josh said, smiling widely.  Tyler shrugged.

“It’s cool. The least I could do.” He replied grinning. The whole evening had been surreal for Josh. The feeling of being onstage had almost overwhelmed him into the darkness of him mind. But he’d managed through it and once he’d began to play; the audience and his anxiety had disappeared. Josh had only acknowledged the crowd at the end of the show, when his eyes had refocused and landed on Tyler. He’d watched as the look in Tyler’s eye had changed from happiness to barely concealed anger before he’d turned away. Without really meaning to, Josh had gotten to his feet, only understanding where his body was taking him when his hand had made contact with Tylers arm. His skin had been cold and Josh noticed the goosebumps that occurred when he’d placed his hand on Tyler’s shoulder. And now they were here; stood outside a closed Jamie’s Cafe waiting to be picked up and with a promise to try and get back to old times. 

“What happened to your car? My Mom told me you got a car for your last birthday?” Tyler said, a slight frown on his face. Josh nodded.

“Yeah I did. I’ve been saving for a drum kit so all my money has been going towards that. So I drove it until it ran out of gas and it’s going to sit in the garage until I’ve got my kit.” Josh said, shuffling his foot to create marks in the dry earth beneath. 

“What about you? Any closer to your own car?” Josh asked, Tyler laughed dryly.

“My parents are considering getting a second car when Mads gets her license, so I’d still have to share with her. They did say if I can find and finance my own I can have one. But that’s along way down the line.” Tyler said, shrugging. Josh nodded, eyes on the ground as he thought.

“Well, i have a car and you have gas money. If you ever need to get anywhere in a rush, they offers there.” Josh said, shrugging. Tyler smiled.

“Thanks Josh, I’ll keep that in mind” Tyler replied, his eyes expressing more gratitude than he could vocalise. The pair stood in silence for a few moment but Josh was happy to note this silence was nowhere near as awkward as before.

“Hey, fancy coming to the game tomorrow?” Tyler asked, scratching behind his ear; something he only does when he’s nervous. Josh thought for a moment. He wasn’t much of a sports guy, but as much as he didn’t care for the game he knew this was Tyler trying to reach out. 

“Sure. I might have to drag Brendon along though so prepare for some complaining” Josh said, chuckling. Something seemed to cloud Tyler’s face then, an emotion Josh couldn’t pinpoint. But it was gone as fast and it had appeared so Josh dismissed it. 

“Noted, I’ll bring ear defenders for after then?” Tyler said, his voice sarcastic.

“Only if you bring a pair for me too” Josh added, grinning. The pair laughed.

 

********************

 

The ride home had been filled with casual chatter between Tyler, Josh and His Mom, and for a moment Josh had forgotten that Tyler had ever left. It looked like it would be easier to get back to normal than Josh had first thought. But he wasn’t going to let Tyler believe that. He was going to make him work for it, at least a little bit. 

It was around 2am when his phone buzzed beside him. He’d gotten in and thrown himself into his homework, he wasn’t quite sure where the time had gone, but the sudden break in concentration had made him aware how tired he really was. Yawning, Josh glanced at his phone. It was a text from Tyler.

** _Hey... I saw that your lights still on and don’t even know if this is still your number anymore but yeah. Thanks for inviting me today. And thank you for giving me a second chance,See you at the game. Don’t forget to sleep._ _Night_ **

Josh smiled, opting to get out of his seat and ready for bed before replying. Once comfortable in his bed, Josh typed out his reply.

_** Hey, don’t worry about it. Thank you for coming today. It meant a lot. Anyway, I’m heading to bed now, so see you tomorrow Tyler  Night ** _

Leaving his phone on the side Josh reaches over to turn off the lamp, settling into the darkness before closing his eyes and drifting off. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! What do you think to the story? Enjoying it I hope :D I’m gonna warn you again for some homophobia in this chapter. I promise it won’t be forever though! I’ll write the bad guys away 
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy! :)

“So, he came. That’s nice of him” Brendon said as they sat down to first period. 

“Yeah, he invited me to watch him play tonight too.” Josh replied, Brendon made a face. 

“I know he’s trying to be your friend again and everything but couldn’t he invite you to something more- you know.  _Interesting?”_ Brendon said, his face still pulled into an expression of disgust. Josh nudged him in his seat.

”It won’t be that bad. You don’t have to pay attention, just turn up with me and stuff, you know I don’t do big crowds alone” Josh said, pleading. Brendon stared at him in mock horror. 

“If I knew being your friend meant dealing with this I’d of stuck with Patrick and Ryan.” Brendon huffed, smacking his pen rhythmically against the desk for a moment

“Just know I will complain through the whole thing and there is nothing you can do to stop me.” Brendon said, now brandishing the pen inches from Josh’s nose. Josh grinned. 

“You can complain the whole time, I promise. Thanks Bren” Josh said, checking the time. While he still had time; Josh dropped Tyler a text. 

**_Hey! You better remember those ear defenders, Brendon’s agreed to come:)_ **

_***********_

Lunchcame around quickly, and with no reply from Tyler. Josh tried his best not to be downhearted, after all Tyler was the kind of straight A student to not look at his phone during class. 

“Stop staring at your phone Josh, he’ll reply when he gets chance.” Brendon said between mouthfuls of rubber like pasta. Josh nodded but never took his eyes from the device in his hand. 

The sound of the cafeteria door opening was the only thing ripping Josh’s gaze away. Each time he’d look up to see if it was Tyler. When it finally was him, Josh didn’t know what he’d been looking for. Had me expected Tyler to be wearing a shirt titled ‘hey I don’t want to try being your friend again sorry’? Josh shook his head. 

When Tyler began walking between tables instead of his usual route to his seat, Josh frowned. Tyler weaves between tables till he came up behind Josh’s chair. Sliding a medium sized box on the table beside him. 

“What’s this?” Josh asked, confused. 

“As promised. See you at the game” Tyler said, grinning. With a wink, he was gone, again weaving between tables to get to his teammates. 

“What’s this all about?” Brendon asked, Josh shrugged, dropping his phone on the table and  lifting the lid on the box. Without warning, Josh irrupted into a fit of laughter. 

“What? What’s in there?” Brendon exclaimed, reaching for the lid. Sat inside, nestled between some tissue paper, sat a pair of ear defenders. A note perched nicely in the middle that read 

‘for Brendon’s complaining’ 

Brendon began to complain, which only made Josh laugh harder. 

**************

*Tylers PoV* 

Tyler could just hear the laughter and shouting coming from Josh’s table when he reached his team mates. He got his usual welcomes as he sat down. Over the years of being team captain he’d found there were two types of people on his team. And they were easily split between Marks friends and Sean’s. If everyone in the team were like Sean and his friends, Tyler would be openly gay. But unfortunately, a good majority of the team followed Mark. And he was far from accepting. 

“So Joseph, how was the fag show last night? I’ve actually been hearing good reviews from people” Mark said, taking a sip of his drink. Without all the poisonous personality traits and bad attitudes, Mark and his brother Pete would be quite attractive, but their personalities only catered to themselves and the girls they preyed on. 

“It was really good actually. To say he wrote it all himself it was really impressive” Tyler replied, acting as calm as possible. 

“Oooo, Joseph has a boyfriend. Knew you’d be a fag lover” said Pete; a evil grin on his face. Pete and Mark laughed. 

“Back off guys, seriously” said Sean from the end of the table, he nodded towards Tyler. With all the trouble it would cause, Tyler was glad to know he’d have a good percentage of the team on his side. 

“I’m so scared Sean, bite me. To many fucking fag lovers in this team” Mark said, getting to his feet and puffing out his chest, his brother not far behind. Tyler slammed his empty drink can on the table and stood. 

“Listen here Becker. Both of you. I’m Captain and if you two carry on I’ll not only pull you from tonight’s game but I’ll report you to the committee. I won’t have this kinda crap on my team. Do you understand?” Tyler said, his face  awash with anger. Mark stood for a moment, chest still puffed in defiance. After a moment the pair spoke; their voices equally stained with disgust. 

“Yes Captain” they spat before turning and leaving the table. 

**************

*Josh’s PoV* 

 Standing in the school bleachers was definitely a foreign experience for Josh, but luckily for him not as crowded as he’d first imagined. The teens that filled the stadium chatted amongst themselves, waiting for the teams to come out. Brendon, true to his word, had begun to complain the moment he’d entered the room and Josh was seriously considering the ear defenders that sat around his neck when the opposing team came out. To Josh's surprise, no one booed, something that always seemed to occur in tv shows. Everyone did however, go wild when Tyler and the team appeared from the opposite door. The two teams mingled for a bit, shaking hands and nodding to each other before our headmaster silenced the room. 

“Good evening everybody. I hope you all are well. Welcome to the game.” Headmaster Anderson said, his voice booming in the now silent room.

“Now I won’t keep you waiting. But before we start can we please give a warm welcome to Tyler Joseph; our captain and today’s singer of the national anthem.” The crowd began to clap as Tyler broke from his team and went to take the microphone off the headmaster. Nodding to someone Josh couldn’t see, the music of the national anthem filled the room; with Tyler’s voice joining it smoothly. 

Josh didn’t know how long it had been since he’d heard Tyler sing. But he remembered he’d always been amazing at it. From a young age he’d been the top choice for singing in school functions and events, and Josh was happy to know that Tyler hadn’t lost his voice. Josh thought back to the times they’d write tunes and lyrics ready for their ‘grand tour’ when they were older; the bittersweet memory rubbing at Josh’s mind. Coming back to reality, Josh realised the music had stopped and the crowd was now beginning to sit. 

Shorty after, the game began, the ball a orangey brown blur between players. Josh and Brendon weren’t quite sure what was going on, but the pair were happy to cheer when everyone else did. 

By the end of the game, Josh had grasped enough of the rules to get what was going on, but with a scoreboard like that, you didn’t really need to get the rules to know who’d won. And if you were still confused. The sight of Tyler being chucked about by his team mates would be enough to let anyone know they’d won. People began to file out the building, with only a few sticking around to chat with the players. Making their way down the bleachers, Josh and Brendon waited till Tyler wasn’t busy to catch his attention. Smiling, he jogged over to where the pair stood.

”Hey, thanks for coming guys. What did you think?” Tyler said, his hands on his hips. 

“I managed to get some of the rule by the end of the game. I’ll have to come in with a rule book next time so I know what’s going on” Josh replied, grinning. 

“Did these do the job” Tyler asked, tapping the hard plastic of the ear defenders that still sat around Josh’s neck. Josh’s grin widened. 

“Speaking of those” Brendon said, injecting himself into the conversation as he leaned over to punch Tyler’s arm. Tyler yelped, rubbing his arm. 

“Serves you right. Now I’ve had my revenge” Brendon said; folding his arms and nodding. Before Tyler could muster a reply, Brendon’s phone began to ring. Excusing himself, Brendon wanders to the far end of the room as he answered the phone; leaving Josh alone with Tyler. 

“I would of warned you about that but then I’d of gotten hit again. Self preservation I’m afraid” Josh said, shrugging. Tyler grinned. 

“No worries. We both sorta deserve it. Not that I’ll ever admit that to Brendon” Tyler replied, Josh nodded.

”my thoughts exactly” Josh said, grinning. 

“Having fun without me boys?” Brendon said as he walked back to the pair, his phone neatly back in his pocket. 

“Tons of fun. Who was that?” Josh said, slipping his hands into his pockets. 

“It was Ryan. Wants to know if we wanna go explore that abandoned hospital on the edge of town tomorrow. We in?” Brendon said, Josh considered it for a moment. 

“Yeah sure, is Patrick coming?” Josh asked, Brendon nodded before turning to Tyler. 

“You in?” Brendon asked; raising an eyebrow. Tyler though for a moment before nodding. 

“Sure, try something new an all” Tyler said, smiling. 

“Awesome, see you two bright and early tomorrow then” Brendon said, turning on his heels and walking away. Josh watched him go for a moment, shaking his head before nodding to Tyler. 

“Tomorrow then” Josh said. 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow” Tyler replied, the pair smiling before setting off in different directions. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! How are you liking the story so far? I’d just like to point out if you don’t have permission from the land owner and proper safety equipment the stuff the boys are gonna do is illegal and dangerous so please don’t do it! 
> 
> Enjoy! :)

Josh was rudely awakened by his phone, the loud buzzing of an incoming text waking him from his dream. Begrudgingly, Josh reached for his phone, narrowly missing his contact lenses case as he grabbed the offending device. With blurred vision, Josh checked the message; it was from Brendon.

_**You’re 100% going to still be asleep so this is your wake up call. We’re gonna be there in 15 minutes so get your ass up my gay prince ;)** _

Sitting up, Josh rubbed his eyes, reaching for his glasses so he could get dressed. Josh knew the kind of activity they’d be doing today so he opted for the loosest pair of black skinny jeans he had and a simple long sleeved grey top. Once his hair was brushed and his glasses were replaced with his contacts, he was ready. With ten minutes to spare, Josh ambled around his room. As he did so, movement from Tylers bedroom caught his attention. Looking closer, Josh noticed a foot protruding out of Tylers bedsheets. Laughing under his breath, Josh dropped him a text.

**_Hey sleepy head, Bren and the others are gonna be here soon. Get up!_ **

Josh watched from his room as the light of Tylers phone lit up his nightstand but failed to wake him. Checking the time, Josh left, taking the stairs two at a time. Grabbing two muffins out of the tray as he went. Once the door was locked, Josh jogged over to Tyler’s house only to be stopped by a note on the door. 

‘ _To the post man, we are all out today at an event. So please leave package in secure box on side of house. Thank you’_

Josh cursed under his breath. Leaving the uneaten muffins on the side, Josh walked to the side of the house, climbing onto the patio fencing, grateful for the height he’d gained since he’d last done this. In one swift movement Josh pulled himself onto the patio roof, walking across the slats carefully. When he finally reached Tyler’s window, Josh stopped, crouching properly before knocking on the window. It took several loud bangs to get Tyler to stir, his head rocketing off the pillow in record speed as he realised the time. With the duvet gone, Josh was suddenly all to aware that Tyler was shirtless. Stretching, Tyler got up, padding towards the window in to long sweatpants, flipping the latch for Josh to come in before turning to his wardrobe. 

“Hey, you’ve got five minutes to get ready, Bren and the others are almost here” Josh said as he slid off the window sill and into Tyler’s room, looking anywhere but at Tyler. Instead Josh looked around. It had been years since he’d set foot in his room, but it hadn’t changed much. The odd poster had changed but apart from that everything was as it had been years earlier. 

“Shoot okay, What do I even wear to abandoned building exploration?” Tyler said, looking at his wardrobe in panic. 

“Skinny jeans that aren’t to tight around your joints and a long sleeved top. Oh and thick soled shoes, you never know what your walking on” Josh said, walking in a slow circle around Tyler’s room, soaking in the nostalgia as he spoke. Tyler nodded before grabbing a pair of grey jeans and a white, long sleeved shirt.

“I’m going to go unlock the door, I’ve got two muffins sat waiting for us downstairs and I’d hate to keep them waiting” Josh said, escaping the room before Tyler became any more naked. Josh had to admit as he made his way down the stairs; Tyler looked _good._ Unlocking the door, Josh brushed the thought away; grabbing the lonely muffins from off the patio table and retreating back into the house.

”I’m ready!” Tyler shouted from his room, a series of clatters occurring before he appeared at the top of the stairs. 

“Here, I nabbed you a blueberry one. Blueberry is still your favourite right?” Josh said, holding the muffin out for Tyler to take as he jumped off the last step. He took it almost greedily, nodding profusely as he peeled the wrapper off and took a bite. Josh grinned. 

“Come on, they’ll be here any minute” Josh said, turning towards the door. As if on cue, the sounds of Ryan’s car horn sounded the others arrival. The pair left the house quickly, Tyler locking the door behind before following Josh towards the large black Jeep that waited for them.

”Hop in boys. Let today’s shenanigans begin” Brendon said, grinning from ear to ear. With a nod the boys got in.

**************

 “Gentleman, we have arrived.” Ryan announced as they turned into a dirt road. Josh had done this kind of thing with the boys for years but from the nervous energy running off of Tyler, this was new for him. 

“You nervous?” Josh asked, nudging Tyler lightly with his elbow. 

“A little, I’ve never done something like this” Tyler admitted. 

“Don’t worry about anything Tyler, Ryan’s dad is a surveyor for the land so it’s completely safe climbing wise” Patrick said from Josh’s other side. For his age, Patrick looked like a child. His height mixed with soft blonde hair and round cheeks made him look more like a middle school kid than a high school students. But what he lacked in height and facial hair he doubled in charm. 

“Yeah Tyler’s, don’t worry about it. My dad would rather us explore with the help of the gate keys than do anything illegal. So you’re all good” Ryan said from the drivers seat, his chestnut brown hair visible over the headrest. Tyler seemed to physically relax with the reassurance and Josh was glad the others weren’t trying to scare him. 

Only stopping briefly so Ryan could unlock the perimeter gates, the Jeep trudged slowly over the dirt road, finally coming to a stop just outside the old hospital building. The group quickly abandoned the car, making their way slowly towards the open entrance of the dilapidated building. 

“This is awesome” Tyler said, his voice so low Josh was the only one to hear him. He was looking up at the building like it was a new planet, his face a mixture of excitement and curiosity. Josh took a moment to just drink Tyler’s appearance in. With years of bitter feelings towards Tyler Josh had never realised just how handsome he’d become and seeing him shirtless that morning had only driven home the point. Tyler was _Beautiful._ Not hot, Josh would never describe him that way. Hot was to primitive a word for what Tyler was. Shaking his head, Josh pulled his thoughts back to the present, cursing himself for going there in the first place. Breathing deeply, Josh grinned, turning his back on the others so he was walking backwards to face Tyler. 

“Wait till you get climbing. Ryan’s dad said the towers safe to climb and the view is amazing” Josh said, and Tyler grinned in response.

***************

*Tylers PoV*

 They’d only been picking their way through the building an hour when the questions had started to come, and Tyler quickly resided himself to the fact that he’d been asked here by Brendon purely to be interrogated. But he didn’t mind. He really wanted Josh’s friends to like him. He needed to be back in Josh's life, permanently. 

The questions had started small, simple things he could answer without trying. _What’s your favourite thing about basketball? What college are you trying to get accepted into? What job are you looking into having?_ They’d managed to reach the first floor of the tower when they hit the unanswerable question. 

“With how popular you are, I’m surprised you haven’t had a string of girlfriends, or at least one long term one. What’s with that?” Patrick said, his face full of curiosity. Tyler had to hand it to him, if he were to get interrogated again, he’d pick Patrick to do it. 

“Good point Pat, what’s the deal with that Joseph?” Ryan chimed in as he gingerly stepped over fallen ceiling tiles and used needles. Tyler stayed quite, grateful he was the last to climb over the needles as it meant he could blame his silence on conservation. He was also really glad he’d taken Josh’s advice and put on his steel toe capped boots today. 

“Leave him alone guys, if Tyler doesn’t want a girlfriend then it’s his choice. Just shows he doesn’t use his popularity to get chicks.” Josh said, chuckling. Tyler laughed, the noise sounding completely unconvincing in his own ears. The boys pressed on at him, despite Josh’s complaints for them to stop. 

Halfway up the tower, Tyler was overjoyed to get a phone call. Pulling out his phone he saw it was Sean. Hushing the others tireless questions, Tyler answered. 

“Hey Sean, What’s up?” Tyler said, turning his back on the group.

”Hey! Super quick question. Do you wanna come to my party tonight? I’m having a few friends over and thought you’d be interested. Oh and Mark and his lot aren’t invited so you’re not gonna have to deal with them” Sean said, rushed. Tyler thought for a moment. 

“Is it cool if I invite Josh and his friends? I’m with them now if you need me to ask if there down?” Tyler said, trying to keep the call going a little longer. 

“Nah it’s cool, bring them, it will be fun to meet them all properly. Anyway, I have to go. See you tonight” Sean said, hanging up. Tyler sighed, slipping his phone back in his pocket before turning back to the others.

”Hey, do you all fancy coming to Sean’s party tonight?” Tyler said, his voice echoing off the walls as he did.

The group all looked at each other, each one seeming to wait for confirmation from the other. After a moment of silence and a bit of nodding, Josh spoke.

“Yeah sure” Josh said, shrugging. Tyler smiled, grabbing his phone to text Sean and let him know. Once the phone was back in his pocket; the group continued their assent to the towers top. 

*************

Once at the top, Tyler couldn’t help but be struck by the view. The tower was missing two out of the four walls and the roof was completely gone leaving an amazing view. The tower was just tall enough to see the roof tops of their small town, the midday haze settling across the treetops that surrounded them. It was breathtaking. Tyler took the opportunity to sit on the edge of the building, his legs gangling off the side of the building. Luckily for them the tower was to high for the local drug addicts to venture this high, so the floor was finally a safe zone again. The remaining group follows suit, each one sitting till they lined one side of the tower wall. They sat is quite appreciation for a while, each one taking in the view in a different way. After what felt like only blissful seconds, Brendon spoke. 

“So Tyler, you still didn’t answer our question” Brendon said, never taking his eyes off the horizon. Tyler took a deep breath. Clenching and in clenching his fists as he prepared himself to talk. 

“Fine. You wanna know the truth the lot of you have to swear and whatever is most precious to you that you can’t tell another living soul. Only the people on this roof find out or so help me-” Tyler said, only to be cut of by Josh’s hand on his shoulder. Turning to look at him. Josh smiled. 

“I swear. But if it’s really that big you don’t have to tell us” Josh said; giving Tyler’s shoulder a squeeze before dropping his hand. 

“I swear. But Josh is right. You don’t have to tell us. Brendon’s just being nosy” Patrick said, earning a grumpy growl from Brendon. 

“Thanks guys, but I’ve been thinking on the way up and need people outside my siblings that know. But Ryan and Brendon still need to swear” Tyler said, his hands becoming more steady as he spoke. 

“We swear, don’t we Brendon” Ryan said, looking to Brendon. Brendon frowned. 

“Yeah, sure. I swear.” Brendon said, the look on his face a picture of annoyance. With a nod, Tyler took a deep breath. Closing his eyes for a moment to prepare himself. 

“I’ve never had a girlfriend before because I’m gay.” Tyler said, opening his eyes to look at the group. 

“Is that it? Honey that’s not big, I’m Bi, Ryan’s Bi; Patrick’s Pan and Josh is my lovely gay prince. You’ve got nothing to be ashamed of here” Brendon said; looking generally concerned that this group didn’t feel accepting to Tyler. Tyler shook his head.

”Its not you guys I’m worried about. My parents would accept me no problem but I have the basketball team to worry about” Tyler said, slumping his shoulders in defeat. 

“What do you mean you have to worry about the basketball team?” Josh said, his voice laced with concern. 

“Sean and his friends are amazing and accepting and they’d be fine with a gay captain. But Mark and Pete Becker and they’re side of the team would rather beat me up before a game than let me play. So I need to keep this quite until graduation. I cant loose this scholarship to homophobic idiots on my team. You guys understand right?” Tyler said, his eyes pleading as he stared at the other boys. 

With a cry, Patrick grabbed Tyler, hugging him tightly as he wiped a tear on his shirt. 

“Sorry, I get emotional.” Patrick said, his voice muffled by Tyler’s arm, Tyler laughed, patting Patrick’s shoulder as best he could when in a vice grip, as if on cue, Ryan moved around to sit behind Tyler putting his arms around both him and Patrick in a hug. Josh and Brendon followed suit until all five boys were hugging. 

“We’ve got your back Tyler. Thank you for telling us.” Josh said, smiling. Tyler grinned back. 

“Thanks guys, this means so much to me.” Tyler said; his eyes drawn back to the horizon before him. Brendon broke the hug first, getting up and dusting himself off before turning to the group. 

“Come on you lot, we have a party to go to and I need at least an hour to get ready” 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I’m gonna just put a general warning here about panic attacks so if your easily triggers don’t read! I think I need to just put a general warning on this fic saying ‘don’t do the silly stuff in this story and trigger warnings throughout’  
> Hope your liking the story so far and don’t forget to leave a comment! 
> 
> Enjoy! :)

*Josh’s PoV*

“Okay so apparently it takes _Josh_ an hour to get ready” Brendon said as he lounged on Josh’s porch chair. They’d all gone back to Tyler’s to get changed for the party, each one needing to pit stop at their own homes for a change of clothes. By the time everyone had got their stuff, the sun and just began to set. Josh had just ran to his house for his change of clothes, and after going through his entire wardrobe, he was returning with nothing, only managing to change into a pair of dark blue skinny jeans. 

“Bren; I’m not a party person, therefore I don’t have party clothes.” Josh said as he fiddled with his house keys as the made the short trip back to Tyler’s. 

“Which leading me onto my next question, why agree to go if we both know you don’t do big groups of people?” Brendon said; stopping just short of Tyler’s front door. Josh stopped, shifting his weight from foot to foot in an effort to ease his anxiety. 

“I don’t know, Tyler invited us and I felt like to be friends again we needed to see his side of the fence you know?” Josh said, his eyes scanning the floor for nothing in particular.

“So you’re trying to be cool for him?” Brendon said, annoyed.

“No! I just want to see if I can handle it; cause if I want this friendship to work I can’t be cancelling on him every time he invited me to one of his events and expect him to come to all of mine” Josh said, sighing. Brendon huffed. 

“Fine, but if you panic, we’re leaving. I’m not having you set yourself back to impress Tyler’s. Like jeez Josh it’s like your crushing on the guy” Brendon said, raising his hands as if to say ‘why put so much effort in?’ Josh stood stunned for a moment. That wasn’t what he was trying to do. Was it? No. They were just friends, nothing more. Josh shook his head. 

“You don’t get it Bren, we were friends basically since birth. A friendship like that takes work to fix. He’s willing to put the effort in and so am I. Now come on we need to get inside” Josh said, turning his back to Brendon and heading up Tyler’s porch steps, silencing any argument Brendon might of had on the subject. Josh walked in without knocking, fully aware that if he had knocked, Tyler would of shouted that is was open and the whole thing would of been pointless. As the pair made their way up the stairs; the faint noise of chatter filled the hall, laughing distinct between quieter conversations. When Josh opened Tyler’s door, the chatter silenced. 

“You left fifteen minutes ago and you only changed your jeans?” chimed Ryan, standing from the chair he’d been slouched on. Josh nodded. 

“I’ve got nothing to wear. Everything I’ve got is ether to casual or to dressy. It was a choice between a collared shirt with a hole in the shoulder or my middle school dance suit” Josh said, rubbing his arm subconsciously. Tyler got off the bed and walked to his wardrobe, opening the doors; barely missing Patrick as he scrambled from his sitting position in front of them. 

“Were you thinking long sleeved or short?” Tyler said, his eyes scanning the rails. 

“Long.” Josh replied. Tyler nodded. 

“And what about a collar? Do you want something that’s got one or are you looking for a smart sweater kinda thing?” Tyler said, his eyes still not leaving his clothes. 

“No collar, planned on the collared shirt and a jumper but I looked ridiculous.” Josh replied, laughing quietly at the recent wardrobe malfunction. Tyler nodded again, quickly moving through his wardrobe until he pulled out a slim fitting black sweater. It had a ribbed affect on the material, giving the black texture. 

“How’s this? You can borrow it if you like?” Tyler said, holding the clothing towards him. Josh nodded. 

“I like it, are you sure your okay with me borrowing it though?” Josh said, taking the sweater in his hands and being pleasantly surprised at how soft it was against his hands. 

“You only live next door so you can hardly steal it can you?” Tyler said, laughing. Josh smiled. 

“As much as we are loving this brotherly love thing, we need to go.” Ryan chimed in, his arms folded and his face showing off his signature smirk. Josh seemed to remember then that he was, in fact, going to a party. He quickly dropped the shirt on the bed, pulling his dusty climbing dirt covers shirt over his head and replacing it with the sweater. It smelled like Tyler, but Josh tried his best to ignore that fact and instead focused on adjusting it to fit better. Once he was done he turned to his companions. 

“Good?” Josh said, holding his arms out ether side of him and giving the others a three sixty turn. Looking back at them all, they all nodded. 

“Great, lets go” Josh said, smiling. 

***************

 “That’s a lot of people” Patrick said as they pulled into Sean’s drive. People milled about like ants on a sugar cube around Sean’s front door. With people sat on the stairs and grass surrounding the front of the building. 

“That’s just the front, they’ll be at least double throughout the house. The garden with be quieter though, Sean’s garden is huge so it’s hard to fill the space.” Tyler said, craning his neck to get a better view. Josh moved uneasily in his seat. Suddenly hyper aware of everything near him. 

“Right, lets go” Ryan said; unbuckling his seatbelt and turning off the engine. With a collective nod, everyone got out. Josh took a breath, determination setting his features. As they walked into the crowded building, Tyler was greeted by basically everyone they passed. High fives and handshakes and fist bumps all came his way at he had random flurry’s of conversation thrown his way. Josh wondered how he could handle it, when they’d been young, Tyler couldn’t stand to many peoples attention, but it seems with his popularity he’d managed to deal with it. He music coming from the house was so loud it would’ve put a night club to shame. The beat reverberating through Josh’s chest before he’d even entered the threshold.

“Tyler and Co! Glad you guys could make it!” Fame a voice. The group turned to see Sean, his face filled with a perfect grin. He shook everyone’s hand, greeting them with the same enthusiasm he’d give to a close friend. 

“Please, help yourself to a drink, it’s 100% illegal at our age but heck if I’m going to say anything. And don’t worry Cap, this is my only alcoholic drink of the night, so no hangovers for practice on Monday” Sean said; gesturing to the bottle in his hand and saluting Tyler. This earned a laugh from the group. Taking a swig if the bottle he was holding, Sean turned to Brendon. 

“Hey don’t you play piano at the youth club down town?” Sean said, Brendon seemed stunned to have been recognised. 

“Yeah I do, sing sometimes too if they want me to” Brendon said shrugging. 

“I’ve heard you play, your amazing man! And you guys!” Sean said, looking to Patrick, Ryan and Josh. 

“You guys are amazing musicians too! I sadly missed Josh’s performance but Tyler here says it was amazing” Sean said, knocking Tyler with an elbow. Josh tried to hide his blush, Sean luckily didn’t seem to notice.

”Hey! I’ve got some instruments in the back that have got to be calling you guys. Wanna come check them out?” Sean said, gesturing behind him. Three out of the four people nodded, Brendon practically drooling at the offer. 

“Great, this way. Oh and Tyler, there’s people I said you’d say hi to in the lounge” Sean said as he turned to guide the others to the instruments. Josh grabbed Brendon’s arm as he went to leave. 

“You said you wouldn’t leave me! What if I have an attack! I don’t want Tyler to have to deal with me like that!” Josh hissed, panic suddenly racing though his veins. Brendon sighed, tapping Josh’s hand lightly. 

“Josh, don’t worry about it, I’m going to go look at the instruments then come straight back; you're gonna go with Tyler to the lounge and we will meet you there. Nothings going to happen” Brendon said, his voice bleeding reassurance. Josh nodded reluctantly before letting go of his arm and letting him go. When he turned to Tyler, he was gone. Panic set in like a tornado, ripping at Josh like he was nothing. He searched the crowd for Tyler or Brendon, but couldn’t see ether. The music suddenly became deafening in Josh’s ears and he held himself back from blocking’s his ears with his hands and running. 

“Oh, You coming with me then?” Tyler asked; appearing out of nowhere. Relief flooded Josh, but it wasn’t enough to stop the tornado of anxiety that had awakened. Josh nodded, his eyes darting everywhere in panic. Tyler grinned before turning and making his way through the crowd. Josh followed, each person he squeezed past causing his heart rate to spike. The world had began to spin when he'd finally made it to the lounge, and he closed his eyes against the dizziness. He’d must of had his eyes closed for longer than deemed normal to other people because he suddenly had a warm hand on his arm. 

“Are you okay?” Tyler asked, his head bent as close to Josh as possible so he could be heard. Josh was all to aware of the noise in the room, his hands becoming sweaty as he tried to block the irregular beat out of his head. He shook his head slightly. 

“Okay; I’m gonna go get you something to drink okay?” Tyler said, turning to leave. Josh lunge at him: invading Tyler’s personal space as he clutched desperately at his arm. Tyler looked stunned. Josh quickly took his hands off him, peeling himself away so he didn’t look so crazy. Tyler recovered quickly, closing the distance Josh had tried to give him and reestablishing physical contact by placing a hand on Josh’s shoulder. 

“Hey; it’s okay. Don’t worry I won’t leave you. I’m right here. Let’s both go get you a drink, how’s that?” Tyler said, his voice so gently Josh was surprised he could hear him even with how close he was. Josh nodded in response. 

“Okay. Now I’m going to hold your hand. Is that alright? It’s so I don’t loose you and you can focus on my hand instead of what’s around you. Okay?” Tyler said. Josh nodded again. Tyler moves his hand down Josh’s arm until he reach his hand, grasping it tightly before slowly guiding him to the kitchen. Josh tried to focus on the warmth of Tyler’s hand but instead it only alerted him to how numb his arms to beginning to feel. A sure sign that a full on panic attack was setting in. Tyler only let go of Josh’s hand when they’d reached the kitchen, but it was quickly back on his shoulder when he came back with a glass of water. Josh took it in his numb hand, his fingers brushing Tyler’s as he took the cold glass. He couldn’t see Tyler properly as the corners of his vision had began to blur with blackness as his heart rate continue to climb in his panicked state, but he knew he was there and that helped. 

“Your hands are freezing Josh. Are you cold?” Tyler asked, coming into his narrowing field of vision. Josh was grateful that the music was much quieter in the kitchen. Josh swallowed, his throat dry. He took a sip of the water before speaking. 

“Panic. Attack” Josh said, his voice coming out in dry gasps. Tyler nodded, disappearing from Josh’s view for a moment to talk to someone beside him, his hand never leaving Josh’s shoulder. 

“Josh. Sean’s here and he’s going to show us to somewhere quite so you can calm down. Do you think you’ll be able to follow me again?” Tyler said, his voice still so soft; the care in every word apparent. Josh nodded, clutching the glass in one hand and reaching his other out to be taken by Tyler, who gave him a reassuring squeeze before guiding him out the room, up two flights of stairs and down a corridor. They stopped and Josh could make out the sound of a key in the door before someone else’s hand touched his elbow. 

“Take as long as you need in there Josh, don’t want you passing out with panic. Okay?” It was Sean, the concern apparent in his voice. Josh nodded. Wishing he could see past this stupid mind fog to speak.

They’d just shut the door to the room when the barriers broke. Without warning, Josh crumpled to the floor, his legs giving way finally. Josh heard a yelp from Tyler, the shock apparent in his rushed movements as he moved to crouch next to Josh. 

“What do you need from me? Can I help at all?” Tyler said, his voice panicked. Josh shook his head. He couldn’t think. He tried his best to remember his own panic attack techniques but they were stuck in his subconscious. He couldn’t even remember how his mom helps him. He was useless and pointless and making a huge fool out of himself in front of Tyler because he just couldn’t _pull himself together._ Tearsbegan to fall and Josh couldn’t stop them.

Josh felt Tyler move from beside him, and he resided himself to the fact he was leaving. The air in the room began to feel restricting as his lungs began to turn against him and he began to hyperventilate. Josh felt hands grip his ankles and he tried to jerk away as the hands tried to straighten him out on the floor. 

“Josh! Stop thrashing I’m raising your legs so they’re on the bed” Tyler’s voice said, and Josh was shocked to find it made him cry harder. He’d gone from thinking Tyler had abandoned the mess he was on the floor and had now taken so much pity on the pathetic mess he’d become that he’d felt forced to stay. 

“Leave.. me. Alone. I’m.. not. Worth it.” Josh gasped, the air that was left in his lungs beginning to burn. Tyler stilled, his hands still resting on Josh's now raised legs. 

“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that” Tyler said, realising his ankles and coming to sit by Josh’s head. Josh felt Tyler’s warm hand snake under his neck; lifting him gently until a pillow now sat between his head and the floor. 

“Now I want you to listen to my voice. I’m going to put my hand on your chest and I’m going to count. As I count your going to breath in. When I tap your chest with my finger your going to then breath out. All you need to focus on is breathing to the count and my hand. Okay?” Tyler said, his voice determined. Josh nodded, barely. Tyler began to count, and Josh began to breath. Josh felt himself begin to calm. Once his breathing was back to normal, Josh opened his eyes. The blackness was gone and he could finally see again. He was in a bedroom, and the fact Sean had a key for it told him it was his bedroom. Josh looked at Tyler, his eyes were also closed, his mouth moving with barely said numbers as he helped Josh control his breathing. His face was scrunched up in concern and Josh was touched to see how much this episode had effected him. Josh swallowed, his throat dry. Tyler opened his eyes, making direct eye contact as he checked Josh over. He moved the hand from his chest to squeeze Josh’s hand. 

“Water” Josh said, trying his best to speak with no wetness in his mouth. Tyler nodded. Reaching over to collect the glass Josh had fallen with. Luckily Josh had managed to spill non of it on himself. Tyler got up, moving quietly around Josh to fill the cup in the on suit bathroom before coming back and taking his position back next to Josh’s head. 

“I can’t let you sit up yet. Your hands are still cold and according to what I read that’s means you could black out if I sit you up to soon” Tyler said. Josh stared as Tyler helped him lift his head up enough to drink before lowering him back down. 

“How do you know about the hand thing?” Josh said finally, his mouth no longer dry and his mind now turning out coherent thoughts. 

 “Brendon did a ghost of Christmas past on me at your performance. Slipped in the back door to tell me to not hurt you by leaving again or I’m done for and that I have to understand your not the same person I knew in middle school. Told me you had panic attacks and stuff and I better be in for all the good times and bad times if I wanted to be your friend. Then slipped out the back like he was never there. So I when I got home I did my research. Wanted to make sure I wasn’t going to be useless when you needed me most” Tyler said, reaching out to take Josh's still cold hand. 

“Let me guess, their numb too?” Tyler said, rubbing his hand over Josh's in an attempt to warm them up. Josh nodded; unable to speak as he processed the information he’d just received. Not only had Brendon gone behind his back. But he’d tried to scare Tyler off with the mention of his problems. The thought left a bitter feeling in his chest. _It didn’t work though_ , Josh thought as he stared at the ceiling, instead of scaring Tyler off, it had made him seek information that would help. For the first time since the pair had reunited; Josh felt one hundred percent sure Tyler was truly serious about this second chance. They sat in silence as Josh regained warmth and feeling to his limbs. The pair only speaking when water was asked for or offered. They’d missed an hours worth of the party when Tyler finally let Josh sit up, and even then he’d insisted he sit behind him just in case. Josh focused on the heat that seeped through his back and into his bones as he lent against Tyler. They sat like that for a while, neither speaking as they both focused on each other’s breathing. With a sign, Josh spoke. 

“I’d like to go home please.” His voice was loud in the quite room. 

“I thought you might, I asked Sean for his car keys when he let us in. Let’s get you home” Tyler said moving his body from behind Josh’s to stand. He extended a hand to Josh, who took it shakily. 

“You’re gonna be okay Josh, lets get back” Tyler said, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze before dropping his hand and heading to the door, with a deep breath, Josh followed. 

************

The ride home was quite, neither boy wanting to speak as they left the loud surroundings of the party and into the quite night. They reached home quicker than he expected, and Josh was surprised how tired he felt when the car finally stopped outside his house.Tyler put the car in park and turned to Josh.

”Do you want me to stay? Sean said I can drop the car off tomorrow if you want me to stick around with you” Tyler said, searching Josh’s face. He shook his head. 

“No. Go back to the party and enjoy yourself. I’m just going to head to bed” Josh said, fiddling with his fingers. Tyler shifted in his seat. 

“Okay, I understand you need time. I’m just a window away if you need me okay? I’m gonna drop off the car then come home. Let them know where we are” Tyler said, smiling. 

“I ruined your night, didn’t I?” Josh said, staring out the passenger side window. 

“Hey! No way. I never stay long at party’s. It’s not my thing, prefer pizza and a movie any day. I just show up for appearances if anything” Tyler said, picking at the steering wheel. Josh smiled. 

“Pizza and a movie sounds good. We should do that sometime.” Josh said, his voice quite. Tyler nodded.

”Good idea. We will do that. Soon. Okay?” Tyler said, his voice light. Josh nodded. 

“Yeah, soon. See you later Tyler” Josh said, getting out the car. As much as he wanted to be excited about the idea, he couldn’t bring himself to feel anything. He walked away without looking back, the feeling of Tyler’s eyes on his back the only sensation. 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! More homophobia in this chapter but don’t worry is gonna be resolved soon! Don’t forget to leave a comment on what you think! 
> 
> Enjoy! :)

*Tylers PoV*

It had been a week since the party. And the same amount of time had past since he’d seen or heard from Josh. He’d tried to visit several times during the week but Mrs Dun stopped him in his tracks, giving him a reassuring smile and a shoulder squeeze before telling him that Josh was fine but needed time alone. He kept his curtains closed and the light off during the day, the only sign of life being at night, when Josh’s desk light would illuminate his shadow and give Tyler a moment of respite from the worry that settled on his chest each morning when he’d see Josh’s empty classroom seats. 

Tyler made his way to the cafeteria slowly, his feet dragging as he thought about his friend. After dropping Josh off home, Tyler had took the car back, finding Brendon and the others before walking home. Brendon hadn’t seemed to react when he’d mentioned Josh's panic attack, and Tyler had decided to distance himself from the others until Josh returned. Something about his reaction, or lack of one, had annoyed Tyler to the point of anger; with the idea of Brendon not caring sparking a deep anger that Tyler couldn’t understand. 

“Joseph. We need to talk” came a voice from behind him. It was Mark, his brother and goons in tow. 

“What is it Mark?” Tyler said, turning to the group. The seemed to circle him, backing Tyler up until he his back connected with the lockers. 

“When were you going to tell us your a fag, Joseph?” Mark said, smirking. Tyler’s heart sank. He felt his face drain of colour as he looked at each member of the group. 

“What are you talking about?” Tyler said, trying his best to sound confused and not terrified. 

“We might not of been invited to that party, but we had friends that were. And one of them caught something pretty interesting” Mark said, reaching behind him to take his phone from his back pocket, scrolling through it until he found what he was looking for. With a disgusted grin; he turned to phone towards Tyler. It was a photo of Tyler and Josh, Tyler’s hand firmly clasping Josh’s as they entered Seans room. 

“That’s taken out of context Mark. He was having a panic attack. Physical contact helps ground him” Tyler said, his voice calm and he tried his best to stay calm. Glancing at the other members of the group, Tyler noticed with subdued horror that they were _filming_. They expected a fight and they wanted to catch it all. 

“Whatever Joseph, if you wanna keep to that lie how about we go ask your fag friend? I’m sure he’ll love to talk to us” Mark said, dropping the phone back into his pocket and leaned back, turning to leave when Tyler clutched his arm. 

“You stay the hell away from Josh. You hear me?” Tyler said, his voice a whispered threat. Mark scoffed. 

“Bit of an overreaction for a friend huh, Joseph?” Mark said, his eyes glinting. Tyler swallowed. 

“Wanna hear me say it Mark? Fine. I’m gay. So pick on me. But leave my friend alone.” Tyler said, squaring his shoulders and getting as close to Mark as he could. Without warning, a red hot pain burst across Tyler’s cheek. His eye feeling as if it was about to burst. Mark had punched him. 

“Pathetic Fag. Don’t square up to me. You’re nothing.” Mark said, bending down to snarl at Tyler’s bent form. Tyler came up swinging, his fist connecting hard with Marks jaw. The surprise was enough to knock him to the floor. Tyler waited for the onslaught of legs and fists from the others. When the didn’t come, he looked around. Sean and the team had come to his aid, each one holding one of the others as they struggled. 

“You okay there Captain?” Sean said, walking to the front and picking mark off the floor. Tyler nodded, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. 

“You’ve got no right to do this!” Mark shouted, struggling against Seans grip. 

“Yeah I do. You and your friends are guilty of homophobia and that is not only against coach’s rules but is also a legal offence. And believe me when I say I’ll be pushing Tyler to press charges. So let’s go see the principal shall we.” Sean said. Mark laughed. 

“You can’t prove it. This was just a fist fight between team mates” Mark said, sounding triumphant. Sean laughed, reaching into his back pocket to collect something. Tyler could see it was one of Marks goons phone. 

“Your idiot friends filmed the whole thing. You created your own evidence by feeding your ego. So let’s go” Sean said, winking as he passed Tyler. Once they were all gone, Tyler sagged against the lockers, wiping his mouth again as he aided his split lip. Tyler had to hand it to him. Mark could throw a punch. 

“Oh my god are you okay?” Said Patrick, bursting through the receding crowd to get to him. Tyler nodded. 

“Now that’s gonna leave one hell of a bruise” said Ryan, appearing out of nowhere; Brendon in tow. 

“What are you guys doing here? Thought you all have a free lunch period?” Tyler said, frowning at the group. 

“Some bright spark in that group was live streaming the fight to Facebook. The moment it went live we headed back to check on you” Patrick said, his whole body twitching. 

“You really wanna hug me don you?” Tyler said, watching as Patrick twitched more in reply. With a sigh, Tyler opened his arms, huffing with the impact Patrick caused as he lunged into him. But he appreciated the hug. 

“If you guys saw it, Josh will have too.” Tyler said, his face throbbing. As much as he liked being out and free, Tyler didn’t think the split lip and black eye was worth it. The group nodded at his comment, all looking to each other with a air of helplessness. 

“You’re gonna have to go see him Tyler. Or at least go by the house and let him know your okay” Ryan said, leaning heavily against the locker. Tyler nodded, the action causing his head to hurt. 

“Let’s get you to the nurse first though.” Said Patrick, using the leverage he had of being wrapped around Tyler’s waist to guide him to the nurses office. 

*************

*Josh’s PoV* 

The day had been yet another pointless effort to leave the house, Josh had been up early, determined to go to class today, but it had all been for nothing, within an hour of getting dressed, Josh had fallen asleep on the bed, his depression clawing at his mind until his body was rendered useless. He’d woken up to the sound of his phone; and the video on it set every nerve in his body alight with fear. It was a live stream of Tyler, up against a wall being surrounded by Mark and his goons. From the bystanders angle, Josh could see that Pete, Marks brother, was filming the whole thing too, a sick grin appearing as Mark turned to go. Josh thought it was over until Tyler had grabbed Marks arm. Josh couldn’t make out anything that had been said until then. And the message was loud and clear. Tyler was mad, the words coming from his mouth like acid

_’you stay the hell away from Josh, you hear me’_

Josh felt his hands go cold with the threat. His fingers turning to ice as he heard Tyler admits he was gay and finally his whole body stiffening when the punch was thrown. It all happened so fast Josh forgot to breathe. The air catching in his lungs. As fast as he’d opened the live stream, it was over. The video cutting off just as Sean and the others helped take down the goons before the screen went black. 

The rest of the day became a blur of worry, Josh paced up and down the length of his room as he waited for the school day to end. Josh watched from the window for Tyler to return home, his barely contained nerves causing his leg to bounce to a speedy beat. When Tyler finally rounded the corner, Josh used every ounce of self control to not run out his home and tackle the other boy. Josh watched as Tyler made his way up the street, stopping just outside Josh’s front door. Josh stared as Tyler seemed to grapple with his own thoughts, looking between his house and Josh’s door before walking the short distance up Josh’s porch steps to knock on the door. 

“I’ll get it!” Josh screamed from his room, racing out and down the hall until he stood before his closed front door. Josh opened the door, the unexpected force making the boy on the other side jump. 

“Hi-Ooph” Tyler said, his greeting being cut off as Josh slammed into him with a hug. Tyler quickly wrapped himself around the other boy, squeezing him gently. 

“It’s good to see you” Tyler said, his voice hushed in Josh ear. Josh broke away, his face warm. With the overwhelming emotions drained into the hug, Josh could get a good look at Tyler. His bottom lip was larger than normal, an ugly red split running down it. His eye wasn’t as swollen as Josh had expected, making him believe someone had given him and ice pack. The lack of swelling only gave way for the deep purple and blues if the bruise that surrounded his eye. It looked bad, but from the way Tyler stood Josh could tell it wasn’t bothering him. 

“You saw the video?” Tyler said, gesturing towards his eye. Josh nodded, his feet suddenly itching to move. 

“Why did you threaten them? I heard you say my name” Josh said, his voice quite as he watched his foot slide up and down the welcome mat; the action leaving marks in the carpet. Tyler shifted his weight. 

“One of Marks goons snapped a photo of us going into Seans room to deal with your panic attack. It looked conclusive to them so they confronted me. Threatened to ‘talk’ to you if I didn’t speak up.” Tyler said, shrugging. 

“So you got hit because of me?” Josh said, his chest swelling with guilt. Tyler’s eyes widened. 

“No! He was going to go after me no matter what. I’d prefer him to hit me and get done for it than them get you and get away with it.” Tyler said, trying his best to take the hurt from  Josh’s eyes. When he didn’t reply, Tyler cleared his throat.

”Me and the others are heading to a movie tomorrow night if you fancy it? I know your mad at Brendon for abandoning you at the party” Tyler said, rubbing the back of his head with a hand. Josh set his jaw at the mention of Brendon. He hadn’t expressed his anger to anyone but his mom, her response was to be as rude to him as possible when he came to visit or rang the house phone. One thing his mother wasn’t was subtle. 

“You don’t have to. I just thought it might help to try fix things” Tyler said, looking around at anything he could. Josh thought about it for a moment. Watching the other boy fidget nervously before nodding. 

“Fine, I’ll come. But he better apologise or I’m leaving” Josh said, his mind set. Tyler nodded furiously, stopping and wincing from the action. 

“If he doesn’t apologise I’ll leave with you, deal?” Tyler said, still frowning from the pain in his face. Josh smiled. 

“Deal” Josh said, nodding. The pair smiled at each other. 

“Right, so I’ll see you tomorrow?” Tyler said, turning to leave, Josh nodded.

”See you tomorrow” Josh said, waving. Josh waited till he saw Tyler enter his house and disappear before shutting the door, heaving a sigh as he began mentally preparing for the next day. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s the homophobia over my friends! Time to focus on the romance! I really hope you’re all enjoying the story! Please don’t forget to leave a comment on what you think!
> 
> (There is some swearing so be warned people)
> 
> Enjoy :)

*Josh’s PoV*

Josh’s week at home had gone quickly, naps and video games had filled the time till it just disappeared. But the Saturday morning before the movie dragged into imaginary years. Josh felt himself going insane as he continued to check the time on his phone. 4pm finally hit and Josh nearly sighed with relief when he heard the knock on the door. He reached for the door to find Tyler smiling on the other side. The bruises on his face were darker than before, the purple and blue rings made his eyes and cheekbones stand out. 

“You ready to go?” Tyler said, pointing a thumb behind him, Josh nodded, grabbing his coat from the rack beside the door before heading out. The pair had agreed to ride together in Josh’s car with Tyler offering to drive. The car smelt musty, the engine rattling as it started for the first time in months. 

“Well that sounded healthy” Tyler said, patting the dash as if to thank the car for not dying on them. Josh shrugged. 

“Yeah; I’ve been neglecting it recently.” Josh said, patting the door.

”$100 more and I’ll be back in here regularly. Oh wait maybe $120, I need new headphones and my mom and sister have already got me gifts apparently” Josh said, waving a finger in the air as if to tell it off for forgetting that. Tyler grinned. 

“So, what are you doing for your birthday anyway?” Tyler asked, turning off their street and onto the main road, the car moaning with every action it preformed. 

“No idea really, family dinner, present opening. Usually end the evening with Dad at the cemetery.”  Josh said, his throat tightening at the mention of his dad. Tyler nodded, eyes fixed on the road. 

“Well if you fancy a quite night, I’ll pick you up from visiting your dad and we can have that movie night we mentioned? We can invite the others and everything” Tyler said, stopping at a red light and glancing at Josh. 

“I wouldn’t want the others there if I’m coming from seeing dad, so are you cool if it was just us two? I don’t want to do nothing for my birthday but I just know I won’t be able to handle to much company, you know?” Josh said, staring at his hands. Tyler nodded. 

“Consider it done. Oo I love this song, can u turn the radio up?” Tyler said, gesturing towards the outdated device, Josh smiled before turning the toggle himself. The song was upbeat, with the beat being an interesting mix of simple drums and complex base. Without realising, Josh began to pat the beat against his thighs, his feet joining in as he mimicked the tune. Through the sounds of the car and music, Josh could hear tyler sing along quietly to the lyrics, his face full of emotion as he resonated with the essence of the song. They pulled into the cinemas parking lot just as the last note of the song ended, and the pair giggled at their little drum/singer duet.

“Come on drummer boy, lets go” Tyler said, grinning as he unbuckled himself and got out of the car. Josh smiled as he exited, shaking his head to the nickname before following him.  

Almost immediately, Josh was nearly thrown to the floor by a frantic Patrick, the smaller boy had barrelled towards in and tackled his middle with a bone crushing hug. 

“We’re so sorry about the party! Please forgive us Josh!” Patrick whined as he hugged Josh's middle, his voice muffled against Josh's body. Josh laughed, patting Patrick on the back reassuringly. 

“Hey! I forgive you Pat, don’t worry about it” Josh said, grinning at the other boy as he peeled himself away. Patrick’s smile went from ear to ear. 

“Oh thank god, I was so worried!” Patrick said.

”We all were. Sorry Josh, we were kinda douchey then” Ryan said, appearing from around the corner, Brendon in tow. Josh smiled.

”Don't worry about it Ryan, were cool” Josh said, nodding. The group fell silent, everyone waiting for the final apology, but it never came. 

“We’re gonna miss the showing if we don’t scoot” Brendon said, pointing behind him at the cinema before turning around and heading to the doors. The atmosphere turned awkward, the remaining group members looking between Josh and Brendan. Josh set his jaw.

”Lets go guys, we don’t wanna miss the movie” Josh said, moving to follow Brendon. 

***************

Josh had mixed reviews about the movie, he’d liked it, but he’d been to distracted to form a proper opinion. Tyler had offered to spilt popcorn with everyone, but when offered, everyone but Josh declined. So the pair had sat the popcorn between them; and had been intermittently taking handfuls at a time. Every now and then; they’d reach at the same time, and Josh could of sworn the jolt of heat he felt rush up his arm and into his chest when their hands brushed was a weird side affect of the dark and moody setting of the cinema. So pretended he didn’t feel it, but the thought of it had gnawed at him for the rest of the movie. And it gnawed at it still as they’d all left.

”Hey? You okay?” Patrick said, shaking Josh out of his thoughts. Josh smiled.

”Yeah, yeah I’m good, just pondering that ending!” Josh said, silently proud of his quick thinking. Patrick nodded eagerly, quickly spouting off about his thoughts on the ending. 

“Well, I’m off lads. See ya at school” Brendon said, turning from the group and heading towards the exit. Josh frowned, all thoughts of Tyler and the movie gone. 

“Um, Brendon? Can we talk first?” Josh said, trying his best to keep his voice level. Brendon stopped, turning back to the group and shrugging his okay. 

“I think we _all_ left something in my car” Ryan said, gesturing towards the exit. Tyler and Patrick nodded, mumbling their agreement as they gave the pair time to chat. 

“What’s up?” Brendon said once they were alone, his hands finding his way to his pockets as he leaned against the wall. Josh’s jaw clenched. 

“What’s up? You left me at a party alone and you’re the only one who hasn’t apologised for it.” Josh said, his voice tainted with anger. Brendon shrugged.

”I left you with Tyler. Anyway I needed you to react like you did to see if Tyler was legit about being your friend” Brendon said, his tone bored. Josh’s eyes nearly bugged out of his face. 

“You _wanted_ me to have a panic attack? Are you serious?” Josh said. Brendon nodded. 

“You used my anxiety as a test to see if Tyler could handle me at my worst, didn’t you?” Josh said, shaking his head in disbelief. 

“I needed to prove to you that he wasn’t worth the effort! He’s just feeling guilty and now he’s making up for being shitty!” Brendon said, raising his voice. Josh felt his hands clench. 

“Well it backfired didn’t it! Cause he didn’t run away. Oh and thanks for trying to scare him off at the gig, real classy sneaking in, basically threatening him then leaving. I don’t need you as some guardian angel Brendon.” Josh said, practically spitting the words at him as his temper grew. Brendon rolled his eyes. 

“I saw everything. I was stood at the edge of the room waiting to step in when Tyler bailed. I wouldn’t actually leave you. That’s why I’m not apologising. I never actually left you. I tested his loyalty, he passed.” Brendon said, his tone suggesting this tidbit of information solved everything. Josh began to shake. 

“What the fuck Brendon! You think standing on the sidelines waiting excuses the fact you used my anxiety to make someone leave me. You used my own insecurities in an attempt to prove a point. That attack was one of the worst I’ve had in years and you think telling me you were stood waiting to be my saviour will make me forgive that?” Josh shouted, the anger spilling out of him in waves. Brendon looked startled, his eyes going for shock to anger in a blink. 

“You know what Josh, I was doing you a favour! I was trying to show you that he’s gonna leave you sooner or later. Yeah he passed that test but just wait till you have one of your low days and you feel like ending it all, or the days you only want to watch the same shitty show all day and barely talk. You're to much work Josh.” Brendon’s eyes widened as he realised what he was saying, but it was to late. Josh could tell from his sudden change in expression that the hurt he was feeling was evident on his face. 

“He’d never, I mean ever. Going to be to much work for me.” Tyler said from behind him. The other stood silently by the door, their faces somber. Tyler’s face was set into a hard stare, silent fury bubbling behind his dark irises. Brendon seemed to shrink under his gaze, all the anger drained from as the second he’d said it. _Your to much work Josh._ It echoed in his head like a headache, causing all the recent memories he had with his friends start become sour as the reality set in. Brendon never saw him as an equal, he’d seen him as _hard work_. Tylers voice echoed faintly in Josh's head, and it took him a while to realised he was being spoken to. 

“Josh? Hey?” Tyler said. He was stood in front of him, his body crumpled up in a half crouch so he could look up into Josh's face. Josh hadn’t hear him move, so opening his eyes to see him so close had startled him, causing him to raise his head quickly. 

“Hey, don’t worry. Your okay. Just making sure you’re still with us. Okay?” Tyler said, raising his hands as if to say ‘don’t panic’ a soft smile gracing his face. Josh quickly thought about the warmth he’d felt consume his body when him and Tyler had brushed hands, his mind screaming at him to forget it cause he’d never feel the same. The dark tendrils of his depression began to snake through his emotions, turning every encounter with Tyler and his friends into sour thoughts of being the burden of the group. 

“Ryan, Patrick. Can you walk us to the car please?” Tyler said, giving Josh's shoulders a squeeze before turning to Brendon. 

“Why would you say that Bren? Why say something that can hurt him so much? Or is this another test? I’ve seen the anxiety, not the depression? Is that it?” Tyler said, his voice practically a growl, Brendon spluttered where he stood, unable to speak. Tyler cut him off. 

“Forget it. Don’t call him, don’t text him. He’ll talk to you when he’s ready. Until then, he’ll be eating lunch with me.” Tyler said his tone final. Brendon nodded, the defeat evident in his slouched shoulders. Turning, Tyler guided Josh out the building, Ryan and Patrick close behind. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for going awol on you all, I’ve been super busy! But here’s another chapter and I really hope you like it! 
> 
> Enjoy :)

*Tylers PoV*

Once in the car, Tyler exhaled, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. He turned to Josh.

”Would you like me to take you home?” Tyler said, his voice as gentle as he could make it. Josh shook his head. His eyes filled with tears as he glanced in Tyler’s direction. 

“Don’t leave me. Please” Josh said, his voice barely above a whisper. Tyler nodded, putting a hand on Josh’s. 

“I won’t. Do you want the others to come too?” Tyler asked, his hand never leaving Josh’s; he shook his head. Tyler nodded again then turned to look out the car window, shaking his head and mouthing ‘I’ll text you’ to Ryan and Patrick; who stood ready to follow them if Josh wanted them too. With a nod they left, turning to walk to the car, their heads bent in worried chatter. Slowly, Tyler retracted his hand from Josh grip to put it on the steering wheel. 

“Lets get you home.” Tyler said, looking back as he reversed out of the parking place. Josh was silent. With a sad nod; Tyler drove home. 

**************

“What do you fancy watching?” Tyler said. They’d driven home in silence; and with much coaxing, Tyler had managed to get Josh into the house and into his room. He now sat on Tyler’s bed, his arms wrapped around his knees and his eyes staring at nothing. He didn’t reply. 

“I’m gonna put on _How I Met Your Mother_ Okay? I know we’ve both watched it but it’s good background noise” Tyler said, smiling at Josh. He still said nothing. Tyler’s shoulders slumped. He hated seeing Josh like this. The tear tracks down his face rugged at Tyler’s heart. He thought back to the cinema and the feeling he’d gotten when their hands had brushed amongst the popcorn. He’d realised then that he wasn’t just wanting friendship. He’d developed feelings for him. And these feeling had got from crush to falling in love faster than a rocket car. Tyler moves to sit on the bed, making sure he was close enough for Josh to grab him if he needed to but not enough to smother him. Josh continued to sob silently into his knees, his breath quite and uneven. 

“Look Josh. I have no idea what possessed Brendon to be like that. But it doesn’t matter now. What matters now is what he said is bullshit. The only people who will find you hard work are the people who don’t deserve you.” He took a breath, staring at his hands as he spoke. 

“What’s going to happen now is I’m going to watch tv, and you can do what you want. If you want to scream at me that I’m faking all this and I’m going to leave. Do it. Just know once you’ve run out of words I’m going to tell you that you’re wrong and that I’m going nowhere. If you want to tell me quietly that I’m going to leave and I’m faking it then you can. But again I’m going to tell you you’re wrong.” Tyler said, turning to face the silent boy beside him. 

“Whatever you want to do, I’m cool with it. But I’m going to say this. Whatever that evil little monster in your head is saying about me and about Ryan and Patrick. They're wrong. We’re not going to leave you. Ever. If I have to sit here and tell you that every minute of the day for the next year, I’ll do it.” Tyler said, trying his best to bleed the emotion he was feeling through his pores and into Josh’s mind. 

Turning to face the tv again, Tyler relaxed, leaving back against the headrest in an attempt to loosen the knots in his heart and stomach. Without warning; Josh fell into Tyler’s side, unfolding himself from his knee hugging position to curl up against Tyler’s side. Tyler’s face flushed, his body reacting to the contact by shooting goosebumps along his body. Without hesitation, Tyler wrapped and arm around Josh’s body, feeling as his shaky breath and quite sobs vibrated his body. The desire to stoke Josh’s hair became overwhelming to the point Tyler gave in, slowly moving his hand from his shoulder to his hair, a tiny shock of excitement buzzing through Tyler as he noted how soft his hair was. 

They stayed like that for hours; Tyler playing with Josh’s hair long after his sobs had stopped and his steady breathing indicated he’d fallen asleep. He wasn’t sure what to do about his feelings for the sleeping boy, but Tyler knew he’d tell him. Not yet, but he’d tell him. He just hoped against hope that he felt the same. 


End file.
